(From the contributor: “I teach third grade ESL (English as a Second Language) and my class is an inexhaustible source of unusual quotes, strange statements and all the rest. Here are a few:”)

For an activity where the students were supposed to practice writing sentences using the past tense of “to be,” one of my third-graders wrote about a red pony:

“The red pony was on fire. The fire trucks were coming.”

During sharing time one of my students wanted to discuss the fighting techniques he used in his favorite Playstation game (Mortal Kombat, I think):

“…And this one guy, he was shooting his asses out of his mouth. He was shooting his asses at the other guy and it was burning him.”

I eventually determined that “asses” referred to acids that I assume the players shoot at each other.